It’s that time of the year again when your newsfeed is bombarded with shimmering over-the-top wedding photos. Some of them contain way too many pouting faces to count and some with sentimental moments. You “lucky” souls even get to experience “Bride-zillas” wreak havoc, inlaws complaining and children running through the dance performances prepared for weeks if not for months. If that’s not enough, the innate alarm clock in your parents start going off to remind/guilt-trip their adult children into getting married. When all of their efforts go in vain, your relatives get into a tag team championship with your parents into asking these questions. In such dire moments of survival, one needs to master the pro-move of deflection. Move mentioned below.

Pro Move: First give an innocent Smile. Then Nod while looking through them. And last but no least Walk away like your life depends on it. Just to make it clear, Smile, Nod and Walk away.
Among these dramas and “fun” moments, wedding season is back in full swing, bringing with it all kinds of mixed feelings. Kachchi being the main attraction for most of us, attending these emotion-induced events can be made fun as well if you know your way around it.
Juta Churi is one of many traditions that can be an adrenaline-filled heist. It is a culturally motivated shenanigan which only the 90s kids can relate to. Like from the decades-old movie Hum Aapke Hain Koun. There is an entire segment in the movie dedicated to the age-old tradition of Juta Churi. Yes, that’s right whoever reading this article and has seen Hum Aapke Hain Koun, in their childhood, be sure that you and I are old. It’s basically the young ones stealing the groom’s expensive shoes, like Apex’s Venturini, as he takes them off to get up on the stage or when he sits down to feast on the whole-roasted goat Khashi. Then the thieves or hustlers ask for fresh crisp notes in exchange for the pair. This ritual, however, is dying out.
The goal is relatively simple if you understand the composure of the Groom, given you’re on the bride’s team. You start off by keeping your eyes on the groom’s shoes to scrape out a convenient moment to swipe them only to be returned after a monetary transaction has been completed.
However, your path will be barred by adversaries, the death eaters (Harry Potter Reference) of the groom side. You have to be swift with your sleight of hand when you do the deed.
I’ve been personally part of a Juta Churi incident. It turned ugly very fast. It was at my friend’s wedding. We conveniently stole our dulabhai’s naagras (ethnic footwear) and while the deed was being done, a full-blown brawl broke out which was obviously mitigated at the after-party.

Piece of Advice: Announce the Juta Churi a week before the event and come to an agreement over the amount to avoid a fight from breaking out on the big day.
Our wedding ceremonies have become elaborate. We lavishly decorate a gargantuan venue, meticulously choreograph a Bollywood level dance routine, and invite every acquaintance we have crossed path with in life! Slowly but surely new customs like the mandated after-party have permeated into our wedding celebrations. If we put in just a fraction of the effort into sustaining the age-old tradition of Juta Churi, then we might just be a lucky generation to add another celebratory note to our matrimonial madness.

K Tanzeel Zaman, Subeditor of ICE Today Magazine. He is an avid traveler, aiming to fill up his passport and express his perspective of the world through his write-ups.