First of all, can we just establish that 2:30am CNG girl is an absolute queen?
May we all possess the same courage and chutzpah to defend against the harassment, disguised as protection, that women in Bangladesh are so often subjected to.
If you don’t know what I’m talking about – a video went viral on social media recently, where policemen stopped a girl travelling alone in a CNG late at night and berated her for her time of travel, mode of travel, choice of clothing and quality of upbringing. Berated would be a kind word here, whereas in fact, they (note: more than one) tormented and teased her to no end, questioning her morality and terming her “bad”.
Who is a bad girl?
Are some girls born bad?
How does one become a bad girl?
Am I a bad girl?
I think so.
Sometimes I don’t wear a dupatta. I go home after dark. I have friends who are boys and I hold opinions that I will express. In the eyes of the majority of Bangladeshi society, I am almost definitely a bad girl; a kharap meye.
Do you know who else are thrown into this category? Working women with responsibilities post-sunset (or until quite recently, working women full stop), women in the media, prostitutes, actresses, air hostesses, models, women with blue hair, women with short hair, women wearing jeans, women smoking, women with their eyes anywhere but on the ground where they belong.
Generally speaking, anyone who upsets tradition and dares to be different is blacklisted by society. However, contempt for women who do the same holds a special position in the minds of those who feel they have a greater right to choice and freedom than others.
The very notion of ‘bad’ or ‘good’ is derived from an understanding of morality. Morality refers to a code of behaviour exercised by humans to preserve harmony and health for the individual and the wider world. If a “good” person is concerned with the upkeep of peace and well-being, must a “bad” person therefore not be required to cause destruction and harm in order to earn that title?
Human beings rarely act with logic, but a case can be made for the ideal. The opposite of good is also evil, suggesting that to be bad, an element of evil must be present. Therefore, to be bad you must be harmful to those around you, or at least to yourself.
Who was the girl in the CNG harming? Who was she inconveniencing? What was she disturbing? Nothing other than the image of the “good” woman existing in the minds of a few men whose feelings of this sort should have no place in the Bangladesh of 2018. However, the video proves that these forces are alive and well. The worst part of this episode was that the policemen felt they would be congratulated and praised for their noble initiative to weed out the rot from society and uploaded the video to social media with this hope.
It was comforting to see that a majority of the comments under the video were severely criticising the policemen’s actions and defending the girl’s right to her freedom. It shows a positive evolution in people’s views. With sadness I write ‘majority’ because it was not all of them.
I want to live in a Bangladesh where a person – man, woman, neither or both; security force member or average citizen – sees a fierce, independent woman for exactly that, without assumptions of limitless availability for sex.
Bangladesh really has come a long way in changing the mould that women have to fit into. Women ride scooters to work, women travel alone, women join politics and women are breadwinners. But those changes really came from women themselves – how far they pushed the boundaries and how long they were willing to fight.
The fight will go on with or without you, but your condemnation and public expression of disgust at such foul play will be thoroughly appreciated.