While it is true, that child marriage is a far more devastating reality for girls, who are forced to marry much older men and suffer marital rape, physical abuse and pregnancy complications, a recent UNICEF data shows that, currently 156 million men were married off before the age of 18. While boys do not have to face sexual coercion or suffer pregnancy, they are forced too at a young an age to undertake the financial burden of raising a family.
The U.S. based organisation which advocates children rights, Save the Children has been working in Bangladesh since 1970 and has taken the initiative to stop child marriage, for girls and for boys.
So, in a country that is ranked as the third poorest in South Asia and where in its parliament there is talk about reducing the age of marriage (with consent of parents of course) from 18 to 16 for girls and from 21 to 18 for boys, the issue of child marriage is not only a problem for girls, but for boys as well.
Boys as young as 9 are married off in countries like Nepal, India and Bangladesh, who have not yet even grown facial hair to shave and are expected to work hard in the fields, drive bullock carts, and procreate.
In communities where child marriage is prevalent, however, sex education is virtually non-existent. And prepubescent boys, after overcoming the initial trauma of conjugal bliss, along with their under-age brides are not aware of birth control and family planning, which often results in a brood of children by the time they reach their 30s. Ramsharan Reidas, a Nepalese community activist who himself was married off at 7 years of age, observed that child marriage “is a way for families to control the boys’ sexuality, and for poor families to get rid of one of their obligations. If the boy is married, it’s a given that he is now an adult and he should be taking care of himself.”
With children and a wife to support, time and money spent on education seems like a frivolous waste of time, and most child grooms drop out and a life of gruelling menial labour ensues where the child groom, his child bride and their children are trapped deeper in a cycle of poverty from which there is nearly no escape.
However, there is very little research and data on the plight of child grooms, and the women-only focus on the issue do not provide the whole picture of the phenomenon, making them undetectable to children rights’ activists and advocates. Sabitra Dhakal, who’s heading the Tipping Point movement in Nepal observes that it is these child grooms who grow up to the patriarchs of their community who end up perpetuating the same traditions that landed them in a child marriage, crushing their dreams and ambitions.
So, perhaps research and advocacy in the condition of child grooms may be the missing link in solving the crisis of child marriage.